Ugh!

Mike and Angie...thanks for all you're doing to try and help this situation! I know I speak for most of us when I say we appreciate your efforts on our behalves to try and resolve such an aggrivating situation.

Angie, thanks for being such a good example of loving service. Although there have been many hard words and hurt feelings (and cheek bones), I have to assume, deep down your kindness has been received with a measure of thankfulness.

Even as I attempt to find the words that will adequately express my frustration, I find it terribly difficult. One of the significant stumbling blocks to any positive outcome to this or any other situation we may find ourselves in with Mom and Dad is that Dad has never been able to put others needs or desires ahead of his own. Its really that simple! I'm not trying to belittle or disrespect our father it just helps me understand, at least to some degree, why things continue to turn out the way they do in our family. If one applies this perspective to the challenges of the past, no matter how far back one goes or the challenge faced by the family or dad himself, his selfish disires have led to poor outcomes, abrassive tones, harsh words and hurt feelings. If he feels threatened by someone or something, he lashes out, speaks unkindly, gets defensive and rationalizes his behavior (and calls the police). As we have all grown and matured, for the most part at least, we recognize the fault in this mindset. We subsequently are learning to overcome this "natural man" and do our best to be humble and kind. Are we always shinning examples of perfection? Absolutely not...but, our interntions are pure, our desire is for the best and our only hope is to see that Mom and Dad are happy and well cared for. The financial burden, being placed on Mom and Dad, either intentionally or inadvertantly, by the presence of Joe and his family simply is not fair...mostly to Mom. Because Dad selfishly has the need to be needed by Joe, the situation remains and he overbareingly places his will in front of his sweet wife's and subsequently they all suffer. We see it now and they will see it someday. Perhaps then will they wish that they possessed the wisdom and courage to follow the council of thier children, brothers and sisters. For now we are probably left to be patient and to love them in spite of thier poor decisions. Unfortunately, this love may have to be expressed from a distance at times, because it sounds like this may be what they have grown to prefer. I wish this were not the case however, agency remains a powerful tool of learning regardless of how far down the path we find ourselves in this life!